So things are a little more excitable now that we're active in the child search process than I expected. We've been told over and over to enjoy phase 1 because things are in our control as far as timing and phase two means a lot of waiting and not much going on. I expected to have the question of "when?" ever present in the back of my mind and maybe to get a little frustrated that it was taking so long with nothing else "to do".
Now that I've spent 4 days in this phase I have to say it's way more exciting than I expected. We've had two kids meeting our criteria (for the most part) presented to us. The first we passed on and the second, which was today, is something we're hopeful about. Our agency contacted us to let us know they submitted our homestudy which was a little surprising but I know they need to move quickly. We also had the option to pull out but it became real when I was sitting at work and read "Your home study HAS been submitted". I won't lie...it made my heart skip a beat.
My mind begins to race with the possibilities of this placement and wondering if this will be "the one". I'm just praying with all my being that we will only be selected if it is what is meant to be. I also have to wonder if I'll be feeling this way every week for months or even a year! That's the reality of what a lot of people go through. They submit their info and for whatever reason they might not be picked. I thought I knew excitement but this is giving me a new definition. I'm not sure my heart is cut out to go through this on a regular basis.