Monday, March 28, 2011

Nursery Photos

I wanted to share some photos of the room we have ready. We've decided not to paint the room for now since there's a good chance we'll be adopting a toddler who might want to have a say in the color it will be. Decorating the room together is something you can to do help let the child know this is their forever home and to make it their own.

We have baskets of books & toys ready to play with

Here's a shot of our splurge, a comfy story time chair

The dresser and crib are all set to go!

Monday, March 14, 2011

Sort Of Nesting

Not too much news to share, just still trying to wrap up a few loose ends before we read our home study. While we’re waiting I’m going through a nesting phase. Many women I know have collected things for their future children before they even start trying for them. I’ve never been one of those women. It’s a touchy subject for me on so many levels. I did allow myself to buy a “my first teddy bear” for the cycle I ended up getting pregnant from. I carried that with me to the transfer, held it when I meditated thinking good thoughts about the egg implanting, and to each ultrasound. When that ended in miscarriage, it was devastating. I can’t bear to throw it away yet I have it hidden in a box because it stings to look at it. What do you do with something like that and why would I want to take one more things if another hopeful child falls through? This is the very reason I have not allowed myself to buy or make anything else.

When our social worker told us we needed to have a crib on hand, I had a really hard time with it. I can’t begin to tell you how uncomfortable it made me feel to not only shop for one but to actually bring it into my house. My plan was to keep it in the garage and not think about it. Yeah right…

Once I had the crib and dresser in the house it was easier than I thought. It made it real, this IS happening. It opened a floodgate of sorts for the need to nest. The frustration with this is unlike expectant mothers who may want to keep the gender a surprise is that there is little I can count on. There is plenty you can buy that is gender neutral for 6 months and under. The problem is I don’t know what age or genders I’ll have. I just have this longing to ready a room but I don’t know with what.

My splurge last week and only new thing I’ve purchased was a comfy rocking/swivel chair and ottoman. I don’t know if it will be for late night feedings, story time, or both. Either way I know it will be a special place for family bonding. For now this brings me comfort and really look forward to the time we’ll spend in it. I’m sure I’ll also keep searching for more things all while not knowing what I’m looking for. The one thing I can count on is the end of each day brings me that much closer until we meet our kid(s) and all these unknowns are answered.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Home Study Visit DONE!

What does Home Study mean and what happens at a visit? Here’s a little Adoption lingo lesson for everyone. The entire process of learning about us which includes interviews, biographies, classes, quizzes, evaluations, photo collages, and finally a visit to our home is termed the Home Study process. Once all that information is collected our Social Worker writes that into a summary (also referred to as the Home Study) which will be sent to the Social Workers of prospective placements, placements = kid(s). Today we completed the Home Visit which is a BIG milestone in the process.

As for what happens at the visit, it’s a lot like a home inspection when you buy a house. It’s a long check list of things that have to be in place and instead of hoping for minor issues you can use to lower the price, you’re praying it comes back clean. The list of what they are looking for is a long one…4 pages front and back in the form of a check list to be exact. Some are super obvious like sanitary conditions (think Hoarders) and smoke detectors. Others are a bit more of a pain but make sense for safety. These are things like locking all alcohol, medications, and cleaning supplies. You also need to make sure there are single strands for the window blind pulls which I’m SO thankful our new house already had! We also needed to have basic child proofing done like outlet covers, drawer locks, and door handle things for places like my craft room and the bar.

Even though we know our Social Worker pretty well by now it can’t help but be a little awkward to invite anyone into your home and invite them to have fair game to walk around and open anything they want. The whole process took just over 3 hours. The great news was that we only had to quickly write the number to poison control on the front page of our first aid book and fridge as well as agree to buy waterproof sheets for the crib mattress and guest bed. Done and super easy to be Done! Even Tucker was on his best behaviour and passed the test as being a "safe pet".

Now for the BIG question…what happens next? Now our Social Worker has to take all this information back and write it all up. Once that’s done she will present the full study to the board of our Agency and have us read through and approve. Then the whole kit and caboodle is shipped off to Snohomish County to approve our Foster License. The bottom line is our Social Worker thinks we’ll have that License in our hands 5-7 weeks from today.

The next biggest question is how long will it be once we’re licensed? No one has the answer to this but we did find out there is a big need in Snohomish County with a strong preference for families who live in the county. Currently we will be the ONLY family our agency is working with that lives up North so she thought we would have a placement quite fast. She said they are even able to push the licensing process up a bit if the “perfect” match comes in before we’re official. The county is willing to pull some strings to do what is in the best interest of the child but this is of course an extreme scenario.

That’s all I know for now. While they are writing up the bible of SarahJay we are working on all those little things like a fire escape plan, finding a Head Start program nearby “just in case”, and the final touches on our photo collage.